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PART 7
1 month later
Scene: The camera room. Ares is lounging lazily in the chair. He’s dressed in black leather. It’s his trademark it seems he likes it.
Creepy ne?
Ares: All right. It’s been a little over a month. And still Sil won’t give me my powers back! Arghh! She’s evil, she’s torturous, and she’s cruel. (He grins) I like that. While it’s not Greece, there are some perks in this world. (Stares at the camera his face emotionless) I WILL get my powers back. And then I’ll have some real fun. And if for some reason I don’t get my powers.. I’ll just have to find a mother for my child. That should be easy enough in this day and age. There’s only one problem.
(Ares grimaces and leans forward)
Ares: Silia has some spell to keep me from
leaving the house and grounds.
_______________
Earlier that day.
Scene: The kitchen. Silia is chopping
vegetables and preparing dinner. At the stove is Buffy stirring a large pot of
something. Sitting at the counter is Ares eating something that I really don’t
think any one wants to know.
Silia: (Slicing and dicing and singing
softly) I am descending, from heaven above.. So catch me I’m falling. Hold on
to my love..
Buffy: (Interrupting) How long do I stir
this?
Silia: (still chopping) For about 2 more
minutes.
(Terry and Jubilee enter the kitchen
suddenly. They look extremely ticked off and Jubilee is half covered in suds.
Buffy turns to them and starts laughing.)
Buffy: (Laughing) What happened?
Terry: (Annoyed) We went to get some extra
towels from the laundry room.
Silia: (still not looking up. She seems
focused on her work) There should be some clean ones in there. Ares was supposed
to have done the linen stuff earlier.
Terry: Oh he did.
Jubilee: (Interrupts. She’s furious) He
also did that last load. But he completely trashed it! We opened the door, and I
slip on the stairs, and in to a sud filled indoor pool!!! (She glares at Ares)
YOU JERK!! These boots are wasted now!!
Ares: It’s my fault? Excuse me, how was I
supposed to know it was going to flood? I just did what the box said to do. Like
always. Except there was so much in that last load I turned that puppy as high
as it could go. When I checked on it later it had started to flood.
Silia: (Still working. Unnoticeable to
anyone her hand seems to be gripping the knife tighter.)Why didn’t you tell
anyone?
Ares: (smiles as if he knows what will
happen next.) Not my problem. If I had my powers..
(Silia spins around and throws the knife at
the god of war. He leans back in his chair and hits the floor with a loud crash.
He looks up to see the knife imbedded in the wall.)
Silia: THAT IS IT! (She glares at Ares, her
eyes blazing a bright purple) If I hear one more word about your damn powers, I
will personally skin you alive and turn your skin in to car seats. Then I will
feed what’s left of you to starving children from those Sally Struthers
commercials! (She turns to everyone else) Terry. Help Buffy finish dinner.
Terry: (gulps as he sees the look on Sil’s
face) Yes ma’am.
Silia: Jubilee, get cleaned up.
Jubilee: Um.. kay.
Silia: I’ll be fixing the machine. (Glares
again at Ares. She sneers.) I really hate you. (She stalks out of the kitchen)
Ares: (grins) Feisty. I like that.
Buffy: (rolls her eyes) Get a life, leather
fetish boy.
_________________
Scene:
The laundry room. Silia is wet, and
muttering cantrips to clean up the room. As everything is magically cleaning
itself up, she mutters another phrase (which by the way wasn’t a spell.. and
to repeat it would just be rude.) and she glows with a bright purple aura. As it
fades she’s dry and clean.
Silia: (glares at the washing machine) Lousy
son of a b.. (She pauses as she hears a scream) What the?
Silia teleports to the source of the scream,
only to find Caitlyn in the lab cheering with Quinn.
Silia: Great. I thought some one was dying
and all it turns out to be is you.
Quinn: (excited) We did it!
Silia: Did what? Find a way to go home?
Caitlyn: Well… not quite.. But we found a
way to bring people here and send them back.
Quinn: We just can’t get us back.
Silia: And why do we need this?
Caitlyn: (walks over Silia and smiles
teasingly.) Well unlike you fearless leader, some of us need interaction with
family and such. We can’t all spend our days meditating and getting in synch
with the weave.
Silia:
Uh huh. Why can’t you send us back?
Caitlyn: It’s like this, as you know this
world has that protective field. (Watches as Silia nods.) Those of us, who got
trapped here before Quinn and I made the adapter for the field, are kind of..
(Pauses to think) I suppose I can say melded with this world’s aura. It’s
more magic than science this time around.
Silia: So why haven’t you started this
visitation thing?
Quinn: We have one little thing we need to
get.
Silia: And that is?
Caitlyn: Well, we need you to cast a few
spells. We don’t have the power to run the portal with the adapter. I’d have
to make at least twelve generators for it now. And well, you can power it up
with one spell..
Silia: (sighs) Fine. Lead the way.
(As they head off Quinn stops suddenly and
looks confused.)
Quinn: What the heck is “the weave”?
______________________
2 days later
Scene:
Camera room again. This time Jubilee sits
there. She cracks her gum and tries to get comfortable.
Jubilee: Well I finally decided to sit here.
God, this seat is soo not comfy. (She smiles at the camera) Ares got in big time
trouble with Sil for the laundry thing. Today was a neat day. We had visitors…
of course they were for Buffy and Xander though. Some old british guy named
Giles. And some really needy chick called Anya. She’s a little like Monet.
Annoying. (Her smile grows wider) Oh! I should yell you about the time Monet
was..
(Sorry but this part has been edited for content due to extreme nudity, drunken brawls and roaming Image superheroes.)
_____________
That morning.
Scene: The library. So large this place is,
it dwarves anything in Sunnydale. Giles is in heaven sufficed to say. He’s
flipping through an old tome on a stand. Xander is sitting on a small leather
couch with Anya hanging off of him. Across from them is a very annoyed slayer in
an armchair.
Anya: (to Xander) You’re okay right?
Xander: I’m fine.
Anya: I haven’t seen you in so long.
Where’s your room?
Buffy: (under her breathe) Cheap little..
Giles: (who just happens to hear Buffy, clears his throat) Ahem..
Xander: (to Anya) Well I’ll show you..
(Suddenly Alli pokes her head in to the
room.)
Allison: (perkily) Hi all! Xander, thought
you should know, one of Cat’s experiments got loose and trashed your room. So
it’s quarantined until further notice. (She grins evilly) And all the spare
rooms have been locked up cause Quinn messed around with the automatic locks..
so you’ll have to crash on a couch most likely. Bye! Have fun! (She bounces
away whistling innocently)
Buffy: (stifles a grin) Oh I like her.
Anya:
(stares daggers at Buffy. She turns to Xander) Is there any place we can be
alone?
(This time a screaming Alex runs in to the
library. He slams the doors shut behind him and locks them tight.)
Anya: (mutters) Great.
Buffy: Giles, Anya, this is Alex. Alex this
is…
Alex: (frantic) Yeah. Hi. Good to meet you.
Hide me.
Giles: What?
Alex: Sil is trying to kill me.
Xander: (sighs warily) What did you do now?
Alex: Nothing! (Receives stern looks from
Buffy and Xander) Ok ok.. I kinda..um.. replaced her shampoo with a green hair
dye.
Buffy: (groans) You must be kidding. Do you
have a death wish?
Xander: No he’s just stupid.
Alex: It was an accident! It was meant for
Ares.. but Jubilee put it in the wrong bathroom.
Buffy: You had Jubilee in on it?
Alex: (grins) Yeah. It was going to be great
if only.. (He pauses and listens. His eyes widen in fear and he runs out the
opposite doors in the library that lead outside) Gotta go! BYE!
Giles: (shakes his head as Alex flees) I hope this isn’t a common occurrence
here.
Xander: Common? This happens every day.
Giles: Good lord.
Anya: (turns to Xander as if nothing happened) Alone time. Now.
_____________________
Scene:
Camera room. Jubilee is still sitting there.
She’s babbling on about how she got to make out with Robin once. The door
opens and Buffy’s standing there.
Buffy: Hey, Jubilee, Sil wants to see you.
Jubilee: Ohh.. time to face the executioner.
(Turns to the camera as she stands up) If I don’t record ever again, know that
I died for all practical jokers in all realities! Long live the pranksters!!!
(As she walks out she says) I need to get Bobby here. Man.. him, me, and Alex
would be unstoppable.
(Buffy watches as the young mutant leaves.
She sits down in her place)
Buffy: Listen up camera. You’re my new
therapist. I plan on venting out all my problems on you. (She sighs) I really,
really hate Anya.
(As Buffy gets comfortable, she fails to
realize that Alli is watching the whole scene on one of Caitlyn’s lab
monitors.)
Buffy: See, Anya. She’s annoying. And
just… well she has less tact than Cordelia for god’s sake. It’s like
she’s the most important thing in Xander’s life. Not that I’m jealous.
(She glares at the camera) You hear me Sil! I bet you think I am. Well I’m
not! I could care less. I..
Allison: (her voice appears from no where)
You have it bad.
Buffy: (freaking out) Hey!! How did.. this
is private!
Allison: Oh come off it. Admit it. You like
your Xander shaped friend in a more than friend way.
Buffy: (indignantly) I so do not.
Allison: C’mon.. how can you not? He’s
always watched your back. He’s always been there when you need him. And he’s
got the cutest…
Buffy: Smile..(Shakes her head) Err..
Allison: Actually I was going to say
something else, but his smile is cute too.
Buffy: (groans) All right. So I like him in
a more than friend way. But he’s with Anya and I’m not going to screw that
up for him.
Allison: If Anya weren’t there, would you
go for it?
Buffy: I.. I don’t know.
Allison: Well I don’t like Anya. Jubilee
doesn’t like her. You don’t like her. I say we have some fun.
Buffy: (leans forward in her seat) What kind
of fun?
Allison: We can’t talk here. We don’t
want evidence recorded. Meet us in the lab.